Home Slice! (or the death of Mini pimp...A fish story)

Have you seen that commercial with the man in the stomach suit talking to the dj's in the kids brain, if you haven't disregard this paragraph. I decided that home slice is a word totally underrated. It's truly genius. I mean really, first you say it to be cheesy and hurt your friends., then you say it to get there attention in the Ikea to embarrass them, then...It gets funnier the more you say it. Really it's a descriptive word that will never be acceptable no matter how much you say it, AND it never loses the cheesiness! Dude I used as a cheesy word to hurt my friends too at first. Now dude is every other word that comes out of my mouth. Home slice that will never happen. I'm going to try to incorporate more home slices into my vocab (until I tire of it next week)

Anyhooo.....

My real entry is about my fish. That's right we all remember the tragic end of pimp my beloved angel fish. Without him Ho is just floating in a corner not interacting with the other fish. So I give her a few weeks to mourn and off to the pet store I go last weekend. I buy two new friends. Feisty...And Flaccid. I wanted to name them both sexual oriented names but alas feisty was perfect because she had a red circle around her eye and looked like someone had bitch slapped her. (Damn I should have named her bitch slapped but I just thought of that now) Anyhow flaccid did not even make 2 days before he was laying on the bottom of the tank (ironic). I mourned his death, and kept him in a tuperware container for almost a week... Because I need the body for an exchange and I'm a procrastinator. Let me tell you how impressed she was when I handed her a sealed tuperware container with week old fish remains and demanded my new angel fish. I got the tiniest angel there was. I named him mini pimp. He was about an inch big and the irony made me giggle any time he would swim near 5 inch big Ho. Alas yesterday I came home after spending the night at Raynna's and both were gone. I mean GONE. No bodies nothing. Feisty lasted only a month and mini pimp less then two weeks. Let us share this moment and take a minute to bow our heads... And think of my next sexual oriented names for the two new angel fish I will buy next week. I am excellent at taking care of fish just so you people reading this don't think I'm some fish slaughterer. Angel fish just happen to be the most delicate fish you can own practically, they are the weak bitches of the aquarium world. I just had bad nitrate levels which was the cause. Thank goodness Ho is so hearty..... Hey maybe I'll name one of them weak bitch...then it couldnt die because it would just prove me right. I know if I were named weak bitch I'd be all... "fuck you....I aint dying ever...home slice! "